Ammonia

As some of you know, and some of you don't, I have been quite sick this week.
I've been laid up in bed and haven't done anything.
Well, I went to the doctor yesterday and he diagnosed Pneumonia. Thankfully I haven't been bad enough that I needed to be hospitalized but I think Thursday night was a close call.

Other than the doctor yesterday afternoon and the hospital (x-ray) this morning, I have not been out of bed since I got home from work on Thursday. In retrospect, I should not have gone to work on Wednesday or Thursday but I am a moron. The doctor won't release me back to work until Wednesday, subject to his approval on our visit Tuesday.

I will spare you all the gory details but here are some highlights:
The antibiotics the doctor prescribed were $85.00 for 5 pills. Ouch.
I found out that it is possible to be frozen one second and on fire another.
Lethargy is NOT my friend. I need to be my energetic self to...be...myself....
The highest fever I measured was 104.2.
I work with/for some really cool people.

And by far the best thing I have heard in a while...

My wonderful Andrew comes in this morning with, "Hey papa, hows your ammonia this morning?"

The coughing fit that created was well worth it.

Another joke...

Here is another great one that got emailed to me...


One day, three boys were walking over a bridge when they heard a guy yelling for help. It was President Bush. He was drowning, and the three boys rescued him. He thanked them dearly and promised them whatever they wanted as a reward.

The first boy wanted $10,000, so Bush gave him the money. The second boy wanted a Ferrari, so Bush gave the boy a Ferrari.

The third boy wanted a wheelchair, Bush said, "Why do you want one of those, son, you're not handicapped."The boy replied, "I will be when my dad finds out whose life I saved."

Discovering Indie Music...

So I have been on a personal quest lately to find some new bands to love.
Bands I have never heard of and that have their own sound.

This morning I am listening to The Pillcrushers and really digging it. The remind me of The Lemonheads, a band that I really liked in the early 90's.

I encourage you to check out The Pillcrushers.
If I find any other gems out there, I will surely post about them.

So funny I almost peed...

Ok, I have been trying to stay "family friendly" lately because of the diversity of people that read this.
HOWEVER - I came across this joke today and thought it was so damn funny.


Q. What did the sign on the door of the whorehouse say?

A. Beat it! We're closed.


Oh man. I can't stop laughing about it.

My Daughter the Superstar!

Regin's choir/dance group performed tonight.
It was badass. I was so full of pride that I thought I was going to burst.

My little superstar.

Yeah...Charles Barkley....

Ok, Cerra, this one is for you.
I couldn't find "Knucklehead" but this is a close second.


Woo! Go Charles!

Why do birds suddenly appear...

And then poop on your newly washed car?

Can I just remind you all how friggin cool my family is? They are the best.
No particular reason today. I just thought I'd say it.

So I broke down and started reading Twilight. So far, meh. I think people hyped it too much for me. Then again, it could be that I am also reading American Gods at the same time. In my opinion, any other book pales in comparison.

Maybe I will stop reading American Gods during lunch and read Twilight exclusively. And maybe I will have a money truck parked in my garage when I wake up in the morning...

Weekend Movie Roundup

Alright, here are the movies from this weekend:

Friday Night aka Quarterly Date Night:
We were excited to go to Iggy's for dinner and then Maxine's movie choice.
The wait was huge at Iggy's so we went to Ruby Tuesday. (Get the Asian Salmon. It's exquisite.)
Anywho... Maxine chose What Happens in Vegas.
It got horrific reviews which I though bode well for the film.
Yeah...
I was disappointed. Well, I had really low expectations so I wouldn't say disappointed. I got about what I expected. It was completely predictable. That is my only knock on the film. It was sweet at parts and funny as hell in parts. Definitely worth a rental when it comes out on DVD.

In the also watched category this weekend:
Maxine and Regin watched Nancy Drew. Regin liked it. I didn't watch it.
Maxine also watched P.S. I Love You which apparently was really good based on the amount of tissues.
Maxine and I watched Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle again last night. Sometimes I forget how funny that movie is.
As I was looking through our DVD collection last night, having an ever difficult time choosing, I realized that we have built quite the diverse (and huge) DVD collection over the years. I guess that comes from both of us loving movies. (And both of us loving a range of genres)

Tonight? Apparently the season finale of Samantha Who. (Or Bones/House) Who knows. It's a busy week so we may have to skip them entirely.

Go Jazz!

That which doesn't kill you...

Usually just pisses you off.
This has nothing to do with my post for today but I have always loved that saying. It is so contrary to the way I try to live my life. Could you imagine walking around pissed off all the time?

Anyways.

I have so many disjointed thoughts these days that it has become increasingly difficult to blog about them. Maybe I will have to go back to the good ole days and carry a notebook with me everywhere like I did when I used to write poetry and short stories all the time.
I haven't done that in years...interesting thought.

So Maxine is working on her first novel. I bet it will kick some serious #@$@. She is amazing when she puts her mind to something. When she is done, we will publish and you can all buy copies. (No, you can't have them free. Self publishing is not cheap and we won't be using a vanity press so buy one you cheapskate.)

That will mean both of us will be published! That will be pretty cool. Although publishing a novel is considerably cooler than being published as a contributer in an anthology.

Hmm. Maybe someday she will become world famous (and rich) and she will be my sugar-mama. Dood. That would be fershizzle. (I don't think she would dig being famous though.)


I hope you all had a great Mother's day! The jazz won just so Maxine would be happy. (Although going in to overtime was a little stressful.)

The true meaning of cheese

What wobbles and jiggles and never goes boom?
Cheese.

What's good on a sandwich, on top of pasta, makes an excellent cake, and is great by itself?
Cheese.

Fried, melted, chopped, grated?
Cheese.


What tells you stories at night when the wind is howling?
Your mother. What the hell were you thinking?

weirdo. get a clue.